Reader, Welcome Back

So...no posts for me in 2021 (not even my annual National Parks road trip)?...Interesting...

Who knew that being a principal during a global pandemic would be so time- and energy-consuming?

Reader, don't answer that.

The good thing is that while the work has been seemingly never-ending, there has been time to take breaks - morning weekend runs, Broadway in Chicago shows & the Chicago Symphony Orchestra, binge watching "All Creatures Great and Small" and "The Mandalorian," prayer/faith groups at church, visiting my sister and brother-in-law, holiday light shows, old roomie catch-up evenings, weekly family FaceTimes...

It's important to take time for the things one enjoys. Because Reader, guess what? The list will always be there, staring back with a growing amount of checkboxes on any given day. The emails will always be there, asking you to do something or complaining about a new policy, or asking important questions. Each of us is only human. Each of us needs boundaries. Otherwise, each of us won't make it till 2023...or possibly even to next week.

Now that we're in 2022, I hope to do a lot more of the aforementioned activities as well as bust out of my Chicago bubble to see some friends I haven't seen in awhile and *fingers crossed* to finally make it to Acadia. Reader, wish me luck.

I doubt my blogging will be regular moving forward - most days I find my brain gets to empty around 4pm, and any insight or wisdom I may have had vanishes. But, we'll see what happens.

Until next time, dear Reader, be well.

Opportunity and Reason for Hope

When I heard the news on March 13th that Catholic churches around Chicago would not be holding Mass for the masses for the foreseeable future, I'm sure I was one of many who thought that we'd be back in the pews by Easter. Online Mass didn't seem like such a bad idea, and it certainly was more convenient (and less of a time commitment on Sundays). On the flip side, it turned out to have a lot more opportunities for distraction, as I could gaze around my apartment or out the window or even switch tabs on my computer. And the whole not receiving Jesus thing... I found myself asking, was this even attending Mass?

Don't get me wrong - we are blessed to be living at a time when technology allows for recording/broadcasting and live-streaming services. Can you imagine what we would have done 30 years ago? Sure, EWTN has been showing Sunday Masses on TV for many years, but it certainly feels more intimate and meaningful when you still have a sense of your own parish or priest celebrating on the screen. So, yes, in a sense I am extremely grateful for the opportunity to log into Facebook each Sunday and watch Faith Hub, or the ACE Mass, or my own parish Mass.

But still...

Lost.
Scared. Terrified.
Confused.

These feelings have definitely been present in both my own spiritual life as well as my role as a Catholic school leader. Without the true ritual of the Mass, I found myself making excuses for spending less time with God in prayer and centering my work less on God and more on what our human efforts could produce. And I know our human efforts are worth something, but they're not everything and we certainly can't do anything without God's help and presence.

Our world is a scary place with COVID, racism, and the upcoming election, to name a few. Thinking about going back to school in August and everything that has to be in place before then is scary too.

But now there's increasing opportunity to go to Mass again. And that honestly gives me so much hope. It's not to say that automatically this washes away all fears and worries - that would be impossible - but it makes me remember that we are a community of faith that is gathered together, physically when able but also in spirit.

Yet, there is realization that a lot of parishes lack the volunteers they need to reopen their doors, maybe because their population is mostly elderly or they are small in number. So, if you're reading this and you are able/willing (within your comfort zone), I encourage you to reach out to your parish staff or pastor and see where the greatest need is so that people can start coming back together to worship, whether that be greeters, Eucharistic ministers, lectors, sanitizers, sacristans, or other positions.

Let us work together so that our worldwide Church comes back strong and is a beacon of hope for all who are struggling in our present moment and world.

An Easter People - 4/26/20

"Alleluia, We are an Easter People"
Poem of the Day - 4/26/20
Audio version of today's poem

We are called to walk this journey of faith,
Yet it is not a path we walk alone
We are a community -
A worldwide, catholic one
And we are a people of hope,
Of joy,
Of love -
We are an Easter people
Alleluia!

Just religion class?

"It doesn't matter. It's just religion class," a student muttered under his breath.

And my heart sank.

Just religion class?

As a teacher, it can be frustrating when you see that students do not engage with the material that you pour your heart and energy into preparing...but when it has to do with the faith, that's even worse, in my humble opinion.

We're a Catholic school, yet faith is definitely not everyone's priority. We're focused on test scores, coverage of curriculum, +/- in gradebook...the list goes on. And these things are important (some more than others and some because our culture teaches/forces us to care so much), but I think it's fair to say we've lost a sense of our mission and values. I honestly don't think it's because we don't believe in these things ourselves as teachers and administrators; rather, I think it's because we let these other things slowly creep in and take priority and suck up our energy.

• What are parent emails mostly about? - teachers grading unfairly, problems with different policies, etc.
• What are teacher PDs mostly about? data, ELA/Math curriculum, student behavior
• What gets scrapped first in terms of needing to find more time in the school day schedule? religion class

Again, I don't think this is done purposefully, but with the pressure to get these kids into their top high schools (so stressful!) and the push to make sure no student falls behind, we are inadvertently dropping the ball on what should matter the most: helping students develop an understand of, and relationship with, Jesus and the faith.

Is everyone Catholic at our school? No - not even close. But most are Christian, which is in the same family and just as important in terms of evangelizing. Are most students practicing? That's a hard no. And I can't judge because I'm not a parent, but when sports games and other activities pull at the time families should be setting aside for dinners, Mass, and prayer, that is a problem. And if they're not getting the sense at home that faith is important, that Jesus is real and someone we should spend time with, etc., then to what end is what I teach going to sink in and be something they think is valuable and worthwhile?

And I'm at a loss for how to help fix it. And I know it's not a unique problem to my school community. But if I can't get the students to take religion class (or even certain parts of class) seriously, they are just going through the motions of turning things in for a grade, thinking time for intercessory prayer is a joke, and not really taking the opportunity to try to connect with God, Jesus, or Mary.

I wanted to do a reset with my students when we came back from Thanksgiving, so I took them over to the chapel in the church. It's a beautiful, sacred space...and even when I explained/reviewed the expectations and why it is such a special place, the way they acted in the space made me feel deflated and appalled. I had to email at least 6 parents about behavior, and I even asked our pastor to speak with them after Mass on Wednesday. We were supposed to do a simple reflection designed for middle school students on the first Sunday of Advent, but it was all a joke to them. Some of it probably reflects on my own behavior management of the class, but part of it reflects that students seem to have lost their sense of wonder and reverence of the sacred. 

So, what now? Before we go on Christmas break, I plan to have the students watch "The Song of Bernadette," as we wrap up our unit on Mary, but I wonder how much it will speak to their hearts. I want to use the new year (coming back after Christmas break) as a reset, but as I look at the curriculum for the rest of the year, I struggle with what units/topics will most speak to their hearts. (And I struggle with how to balance that with student grades - which I wish I didn't have to give, but that's a whole other issue.)

I unloaded a lot - if you've stuck with me through this entire post, I first want to thank you for following my crazy line of thinking and brain-dump. And I want to also ask for your prayers for me and my students (and not just my students but all of the students in our school and those across our country who seem to be in the same boat).

May God continue to bless you this Advent season.

Time for a little gut spilling...and life updates

A (FREE!) jazz concert on Friday night - what fun! I was with a few friends, and we had been standing for about an hour in the back, as the venue was packed. I didn't realize how tired my legs were until we were able to sit down (due to the fact that some people decided to leave early).

As it was intermission, the musicians were on a short break, so my friend and I got to talking and catching up. She recently started seeing a guy she had met at church, so we got on the topic of dating. She surprised me (in the most beautiful way) when she said she's always thinking about a guy she could send in my direction. I chuckled a little because over Christmas break a close friend who is getting married this summer was thinking out loud about single guys that would be at his wedding - his comment caught me off guard too: "Nope, not good enough for our Kelly."

I have to wonder if I come across as some kind of "holier than thou" or "in need of a perfect man" person. (I don't think my friends mean it that way; I think it's some form of compliment.) But the truth is, I'm just looking for a guy whose heart's in the right place, someone of faith and with morals. (That's not so unique, is it? Sometimes I feel like I should be wearing a sign.) If this guy likes the outdoors, enjoys ice cream, has a corny sense of humor (or can, at least, put up with my word play and corny jokes), and will listen to endless stories of students without getting bored, that'd sure be a bonus, but those aren't necessarily deal breakers. (Well, if he doesn't like ice cream, that could potentially be a deal breaker...)

I think a large part of the problem is that I have never had much confidence when it comes to the dating scene. In fact, I once told a friend something along the lines of this: There are so many incredible women out there, why should someone pick me? To this, she said she better not hear me ever say that again. (And I'm grateful for that comment.) But, you see what I mean, don't you? Another piece of it, in my humble opinion, is that while I pride myself on being able to read people when it comes to if/how they are attracted to others (I have high rates of getting this right, for the record), I have never been able to do so when it comes to myself. A guy could be sending all the right signals, but I could be completely oblivious. (And I'm not so great at flirting, either.)

What's the answer? Well, I'm definitely grateful for my friends who are trying to look out for me - maybe one day soon they'll send someone along my path. In all seriousness, it's something I offer up to God every night (especially now that my sister has a good husband, which is what I was asking for first) - it seems selfish, especially with all of the hurt, violence, and bigger things going on in this world (though, I pray for these things too), and maybe it's not meant to be in terms of God's plans for me, but I find it helpful to talk to God about it regardless. Sometimes my prayer is along the lines of asking God to hit a guy over the head (and then to hit me over the head too) - whatever works, right? (For the record, I still draw the line at online dating, even though that clearly works for some people.)


Whew. Just kind of spilled my guts there. Admittedly, that was tough to write - enough about that. Let's change the subject and move on to a few other things...


In school-related news, my school just held its annual St. Baldrick's Day event. It's a tradition that started 9 years ago, when a 7th grade student was diagnosed with pediatric brain cancer, and his classmates wanted to do something about it. They started this fundraiser as well as their own nonprofit for him. While he ended up passing away the fall of his 8th grade year, it's safe to say we will never forget this young man, Pat Mac - the energy and support in the gym on Friday was unreal. His parents came, as they do every year, and some of his classmates (who are now graduating college) were there too. The event started with a local police officer playing bagpipes up the aisle and an Irish Dance performance by six of our students. After weeks of fundraising efforts (through which we raised over $50,000!), many students shaved their heads, donated their hair, or got their faces painted. Even our pastor and I took part this year - and they had us on the stage before the classes were dismissed. (Shout out to those who donated to my efforts!) 8 inches of my hair is being shipped off with the rest of the donated hair to Children With Hair Loss - woo hoo! Now I just have to get used to using a heck of a lot less shampoo. (See before & after pictures below.)

On the faith front, as you probably know, Lent started on Wednesday. The kids keep asking me what I'm giving up, but, while I am giving up something, for me it's more about what I'm trying to do for my prayer life. I kept hearing podcasts and reading articles about "Memento Mori" ("Remember your death"), so I invested in the related daily Lenten journal (image below). Additionally, I have started a practice that when my alarm goes off in the morning, I then set it for 10 minutes later...but I don't let myself go back to sleep. Instead, I lie there and use that time to talk to God and offer up my day. At the end of the day, I have started praying the Examen (the young adult version on the "Pray as you go" app, which I highly recommend!) - I used to do this all the time, but the practice had fallen to the wayside for me. I can honestly say that I wake up feeling more rested and at peace, and this particular prayer brings to light so many small moments of grace during the day.

Finally (and unrelated to anything I was just talking about), I just thought this was worth sharing, as it is good for a chuckle - Happy Daylight Savings!

A leader's lesson in humility

I will wholeheartedly admit that when I received the list of students whom I would be interviewing for Confirmation today I was slightly disappointed. These were 8th graders who I did not really know, ones who were kind of on the quiet side, ones who I considered out of all of them didn't care as much about their faith.

One girl in particular I was worried about. And, as we got ready for her group's turn, she informed me she had not brought her service journal for our religious ed director/Confirmation coordinator. I told her I would write her name down so he knew to follow up with her tomorrow, and I thought rather sarcastically to myself, This is going to be fun.

The first question I asked to break the ice, as it seemed rather low stakes to me, was about who they had each picked as their Confirmation Saint and why. Responses were similar, as names, on a whole, were chosen to honor a relative or because the Saint had stuck with them from a younger age. When everyone else in this particular group had shared, the girl (whom I had my doubts about) spoke up. She said, "This may seem like a silly reason (at which point my head jumped to, Oh boy, she chose the name because it sounded cool - I've had that happen before)... but I took the name Novena because it represents how the Apostles waited nine days for the Holy Spirit and I need to learn how to wait in my life for the Holy Spirit because I need it, especially as I go to high school."

I think my jaw dropped.

(And, if I could have kicked or slapped myself, I would have.)

As my conversation with the students continued, she shared about the influence of her grandma's faith on her own life and for her desire to be more involved in the parish. She was so genuine, and her thoughts were so deep.

How had I been so judgmental? (And why, in the past, have I prided myself on not judging people?) Here I was thinking because she got in trouble in school and didn't always get the best grades academically that she didn't have much of a faith life; yet, I would wager her faith is stronger than mine.

I was both deeply saddened and humbled by our conversation. I had underestimated one of our students, and she showed me through her thoughtful reflection and honesty how much of her heart and mind that I had not yet seen this year. And I know today was still only scratching at the surface.

I knew that I failed as a school leader today, even if it was on the inside where no one else could see but me. But I also knew I learned a valuable lesson - never underestimate or throw out anyone, especially a student. Everyone has something to say, and people are often not who they first appear to be without taking the time to get to know them.

And everyone needs someone to believe in them, ask the right questions, step back, and watch them shine.

Little Reminders...and Little Lessons

It was getting to be that point of the school year that I was starting to question a few things - whether I am right for my new position, if I'm being most efficient and effective with my time at school, whether I'm making a difference...

The list goes on, as it often does.

And then came a few reminders that I'm right where I need to be (granted, there is always room for improvement):

- a note from ACE Advocates with a mustard seed reminder about having faith to move mountains:

- a card (and gift card) from my principal about working together:

- a beautiful bracelet with the word "inspire" and an accompanying thank you note from a friend in the Remick Leadership program thanking me for encouraging her (and for passing on some textbooks):

The people who sent/gave these things probably didn't realize just how much they meant to me, especially at this moment in my life. But I am so grateful for these little reminders...and the reminder to be that reminder (if you can follow that one - haha) for others too.

We are in the business of Catholic education - our students (and faculty) are gifts to us each and every day, as they give us a chance to interact with Jesus. They teach us lessons in forgiveness, love, compassion, hope, faith, and courage. It helps to press the pause button and reflect on these little lessons along the way.

And so we fight on

If you ask a teacher (especially at a Catholic school) why he/she went into education, I guarantee you it wasn't for the money. If it was, then that person is either pulling your leg or needs to have his/her head examined. Instead, many teachers would likely share some sentiment about wanting to make a difference or wanting to work with young people.

It's selfless and noble, if you think about it. We need more people in our world with such desire.

The challenge with this idea, though, is that there are many days that leave teachers feeling frustrated, disheartened, or downright defeated. Students (and parents) question your decisions, valuable class time is lost, students don't turn in their homework...

And teachers think,

Did anything I say stick with them today? 

Am I actually a good teacher? 

I don't get paid enough for this...

I was going through some of these same thoughts after a few episodes with one class in particular this week. (And I was even absent from school on Tuesday, so I didn't even see my students that day.) I had just made a concentrated effort to help students learn about the Mass, and I overheard some of them this morning excited that they didn't have to go due to the fact that it was canceled because of inclement weather. Talk about disheartening...

But, as I was sitting at my desk this afternoon, I had the urge to pick up the Holy Cross prayer book I was given through my grad school program, and I turned to today's reflection. Here it is in part:

If the book would have fallen on my head I don't think I would have gotten the message any clearer. The reflection says that "we will make a difference if we have the devotion, the generosity, and the faith..." (emphasis added) We have to trust in God that we are right where we need to be and to respond to this understanding with surrender and love.

So, yes, there will be times when students just don't seem to get it or when we go through things for the seemingly twentieth time. But they really do hear...and the seeds are being planted. It's definitely important to remind ourselves of this from time to time.

I was also reminded that none of us works in isolation to make a difference - together with parents, fellow teachers (past, present, and future), their classmates, and others, we are all part of a much bigger picture. It's truly a team effort. 

Catholic school teachers make a difference, yes, but it's not about a difference for our own purposes, for we are only able to do that which God makes us able to do.We are making a difference in terms of building up the Kingdom of God.

So, to all of my Catholic teacher and leader friends, keep fighting the good fight - our students are saints in the making!

Seek and you shall...journal?

I bought myself a Christmas gift.

I've been meaning to get back into journaling for awhile now, so I decided to put an end to my excuses. This journal's format provides space to daily record morning and evening entries. The morning entry focuses on gratitude as well as anticipated challenges and grace you need from God. The evening entry focuses on the high and low moments from your day. At the end of each week, there is a weekly reflection as well as ponder questions and space for prayer intentions.

It's incredibly simple and structured...and that makes it all the more likely I will use it (thoughtfully). I think it makes a difference to go into each day naming a challenge you anticipate so that you are aware of it when it comes and how God can help you in that situation or with those feelings.

The back of the book includes a number of Jesuit prayers. I've included a few of my favorites here:

You can read more about the journal at the Ignatian Resources website. If you think journaling may help your relationship with God and others, I recommend you look into getting one (or at least getting a blank notebook).

In other news, I saw a post on someone's Facebook or Instagram about a Saint's name generator - it's a website that randomly gives the user a Saint. The idea is that you learn more about the Saint or you invoke the Saint's help for the year (or for a time period). Lo and behold, I got St. John Bosco! Needless to say, I was pretty excited (even if it is just a random online generator). I love the Salesians - and they keep finding a way to come back into my life...

The Saints are a great way to grow closer to God and to inspire us to live each day striving to be the best versions of ourselves. Inspired by this, one of my New Year's goals is to invoke the intercession of both John Bosco and Mary, Help of Christians, each day during 2018. (I'm also trying to cook more regularly and eat more healthily this year, but that's another story for another time...)

St. John Bosco, pray for us! Mary, Help of Christians, pray for us! I hope 2018 is off to a wonderful start for you and your loved ones.

Understanding Life Backwards

I just started reading a book, Cutting for Stone, and one of the quotes that stood out to me in the prologue was this:"You live life forward, but you understand it backward." In our own lives, how often do we stop and reflect on where we've come from and where we're going?...


An unexpected death, that's what it was. Many of us had no idea this school parent was even ill. This man touched so many lives in his short time on earth, and that was evident at Saturday's service, where hundreds of people gathered in the church to celebrate his life and to pay their respects. His family, kids he coached in baseball, friends of his kids, friends of him and his wife, faculty from the school, and others filled the pews. I was touched to see so many students from our school and alumni who had gone to school with this man's daughter (who is now in high school) - they came to support their friend(s).

Funerals tend to do this - they bring people together and allow all gathered to collectively pause and reflect on both the life of the person who died and their own mortality, not in a morbid way, but in a way that makes one ask, "Am I living in such a way that is for others?" and "Am I living in such a way that, at my funeral, they can say I lived a full life?" (I'm sure there are other questions we should be asking too.)

The priest gave us an image to use to help us think about our time on earth - When we are born, we have an hourglass filled with sand that gets turned over. Only God knows how much sand is in our hourglass. Some people have more, some people have less. But what we do during that time (however long or short) is up to us.

Father's image reminded me of the Mary Oliver quote that says, "Tell me, what will you do with your one wild and precious life?" Let us remember our time on earth is a gift - we don't know its length, but we can live it to the fullest to love and serve one another as well as be catalysts of joy.

I can't think of anything better (or more needed)

I was scheduled to be at school till 6pm today for aftercare duty, but, as luck would have it, I got out over an hour early. Yes!!! That meant I had time to do a few things I hadn't banked on being able to do tonight: go to the grocery store, eat dinner, and bake a cake. Pretty soon I found the time nearing 7pm, which meant I needed to get going if I was hoping to get to Adoration on time.

Admittedly, I don't go to Adoration nearly as often as I should, but I am convinced that if more people spent time in Adoration our world would be a better place. With such hectic and crazy (and LOUD!) lives, our world (myself included) needs to SLOW DOWN. And Adoration provides just that - an opportunity to be still...to listen...to wonder...to love...

Tonight was a much needed date with Jesus. In His presence I felt such peace and such joy. I can't really even put it into words...but maybe these lyrics are close:

My little heart is swelling with a song from somewhere else,

It's filling up with glory and I'm ringing like a bell,

My little heart, my little heart is racing,

It's racing just to keep up with your love and live to tell, and live to tell,

and it's all I know...

- "No Turning Back," Audrey Assad

I feel like I needed tonight even more so than usual, as I now feel grounded for everything about to happen this weekend and upcoming week (which is the last one before Christmas break). And there are a lot of people in my life who need some extra prayers lifted up to God right now. Tonight, I turned it all over to God, and, therefore, my prayers are in the best hands.

Oh when the Saints come marching in...

As we were cleaning up from a Confirmation parent meeting, I told the eighth grade teacher today that if the upcoming 8th graders (this year's 7th graders) know nothing else, they'll know the saints. And we're not just talking the most well-known ones like St. Patrick, Mary, St. Joseph, St.Francis, etc. - no, we're talking as little known to as famous as you can get. In fact, a handful of students are obsessed with Padre Pio due to a simple "Think About the Saints" Tuesday prayer journal activity and me sharing about my trip to the north side of the city to see the relics (which I actually didn't end up seeing because I only made it in time for Mass). It's crazy what sticks with them!

This week, though All Saints Day is behind us, we spent some time with the Saints through an art project posted originally on the Look to Him and Be Radiant blog. I pared down the amount of Saint artwork for each student (from nine to three), and instructed students in the methods for carrying out the project. I encouraged students to do some lesser known Saints, which observers would be able to identify through the objects/symbols and dress/garb included in each image.

Here's what happened - can you recognize any of them?:

The Saints are now all over my cabinet - and it's absolutely wonderful!

So...happy belated All Saints Day! What good reminders of striving daily on this earth so that we may one day meet God in Heaven!

Columbus Day Weekend - Marathon, Ice Cream, and Reading!

Columbus Day weekend means two things in Chicago:

1) Marathon time!

2) No school (if you're lucky)

It turns out that I knew quite a few people running in this year's marathon (none of whom are pictured below - those are random people who happened to run by as I decided to photograph), and it was exciting to cheer them on as well as the tens of thousands of other runners. What a great day!...even though it was probably 20 degrees too hot for the runners...

After we finished watching (but before the clean-up crews came), I went with my sister, her fiance, and another friend to brunch at the cutest French bakery. We had actually just been there Friday night for a girls' happy hour, but clearly it was that good we wanted to come again right away! It was still as delicious round #2.

The way I ate on Sunday you would have thought I ran the marathon... Later in the afternoon, I met up with Marisa and her fiance for ice cream at one of our favorite spots. The weather was perfect for ice cream-licking on seats just outside the building - we had shade from the buildings and L stop, and it was not quite hot enough to melt the ice cream before I finished the cone...

I did try the pumpkin...mmm...

Today I was one of the lucky ones to not have school. I did get up early (so as to not mess with my ability to fall asleep tonight) - I went to the gym, got some grad school work done, and then went to daily Mass at my church. Daily Mass is probably one of my favorite parts of the Catholic church...I just wish I could do it more often. (This will probably be one of my action steps for Advent this year - finding a church with daily Mass that is either early enough to go before school or late enough to go after school.) Today's Gospel was about the Good Samaritan - it's always a wonderful reminder to hear that one! After Mass I got my daily cup o' Joe at the coffee shop near church, and on my walk home I caught up with a friend who recently moved to another state. I tell you - so many wonderful things before 10 a.m.!

Upon arriving home, I did some additional work for grad school and regular school (lesson planning for next week) until mid-afternoon. At that time, I decided to get some fresh air, so I walked up to the park, where I knew I would find some peace and some shade.

It was glorious! My book of choice was Tattoos on the Heart, which I have read before but felt compelled to read again. I'm glad I decided to pick it up - so many heart tugs, so much wisdom, so much love. If you haven't read it before (or even if you have), I urge you to read it (again). One line in the preface (photo included below) particularly caught my eye: "If there is a fundamental challenge...it is to change our lurking suspicion that some lives matter less than other lives." How beautiful and how true! As Christians we cannot think any life is worth less - we are all loved by God. (I also included a poem from the end of the introduction below - read it slowly, and then re-read it.)

Back to reality tomorrow when the alarm sounds at 4:45. It's a 4-day week...I totally got this!

A man named Jerry

I pass by him almost every time I walk to church. He sits in a wheelchair right outside the Walmart food market. As he asks for money, I usually just shrug and say I don't have anything and keep walking.

But for some reason, when he asked me to help him get some money to buy food today, I stopped, turned around, dug into my wallet, and handed him something to help him get what he needed. It wasn't a lot, but it would help. He smiled at me and thanked me. He shook my hand and told me his name was Jerry. He couldn't hear very well, so I had to repeat my name four or five times. I turned to walk away, and he called out "thank you" and "have a beautiful day" after me. I smiled and kept walking.

I can't imagine living on the street, begging for money, having so many people walk by and either ignore you or look at you with disgust. I guess I figured that in some small way I could treat him like a human being. I have no idea what he'll actually use the money I gave him for, but, in all honesty, I probably would have used it on something less important or necessary if it had stayed in my wallet.

I am grateful to people like Jerry who remind me of Jesus' call to see him in each person, especially those among us who are poor or neglected. My 7th grade students have taken to asking me almost daily if I want to be a saint. I always tell them "Yes, one day." Some days I am more successful in working towards this goal then others. But I'll keep trying, one interaction at a time.

The Joy of Sharing the Catholic Faith

I can honestly think of nothing better than engaging in meaningful opportunities to share about the Catholic faith with others.

Maybe I have found my calling as a religion teacher...

Just this week I found out from my principal that the relics of St. Padre Pio would be up at St. Ita's church, so I headed up there after volleyball practice. On the way, I tried to let some friends know about it too (some of whom already did). The Mass itself, while extremely crowded and incredibly hot (no air conditioning), was such a beautiful experience. I only wish I had known and been able to invite others sooner! When I got home, I found my roommates working on some things and enjoying some wine. I joined them, sharing about where I had been. I (unintentionally) threw out some Catholic vocab (e.g. relics), and in doing so I had a natural way to go into more detail about the richness of our faith surrounding the Saints. I loved it!

Then, at aftercare today, one of my seventh graders started asking me about the Saints, as we've been reading about them in the Ablaze book recently --> "Why are so many named Teresa?" This led to how many religious nuns and sisters would take names of the Saints that they wanted to emulate; in a sense, they died to their old selves and began a new way of life. (There are other explanations and reasons too...) This, in turn, led us (somehow!) to religious persecution and other (various) faith topics. I thoroughly enjoyed it, and it made the hour we spent outside before gathering our belongings and returning to the classroom until pick-up go much more quickly than usual.

One more Catholic thing that made me extremely happy today was that we started 7 Riddles to Nowhere in 6th grade. Excited to see FXW (one of their sports team rivals) on the cover of the book (as it takes place in Chicago), they finally settled down to listen to the first chapter about Kameron Boyd, his selective mutism, and the possibility of his Catholic grade school closing in the near future. In a few weeks we'll get to take a field trip to the cathedral, and the students will be able to see firsthand some of the clues and descriptions from the book.

This weekend should be pretty amazing - I'm heading to the ND game with my sister tomorrow, and then on Sunday my goddaughter's sister is getting baptized, so I will attend that Mass to be with the family (and hopefully get in some visiting time). In terms of grad school, I just submitted my executive summary (due Sunday) as well as my action plan for another class (also due Sunday), so I think I'm in a good place. So, it seems the best thing I can do to prepare for the weekend is to hit the hay and get some rest...

Let's go Irish!

Be the light...or be the mirror that reflects it

"There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it."

The lights in our classroom were turned off as we stood in a semi circle around our desks and chairs on Thursday morning. It had already started out as a beautiful day (despite the rain) because we were given a gift of starting class at 9 instead of 8, which meant sleeping in and, perhaps more importantly, getting real (as opposed to the dining hall's) coffee. So, there we were in our semicircle, each one of us holding a small candle on which we had written words to describe what fuels us and gives us joy and peace.

Kaitlyn, that day's prayer leader, turned to the person next to her and shared out to the whole group about how that person brings light in our RLP community. Then, around the whole circle, one at a time, we followed suit - first receiving the light from the person passing it to us and then passing it on to the next person. We were more than likely breaking a fire code - don't tell any higher ups at ND! - but it was absolutely beautiful. It reminded us that even in darkness and hard times, there are "candles" all around us to give us light and, in turn, for us to reach out to and provide light as well.

So, what has lit my fire this summer? Well, the beautiful sights around campus surely have given me joy and peace: the lakes, the Grotto, the quads...

My RLP classmates, especially my PLC (professional learning community) have helped me overcome feelings of inadequacy and doubt this summer as well as brought me countless smiles and laughter. And I've also been fortunate to visit with some friends who visited ND throughout the summer...

PLC 1 rocking our red hats - we were inducted into the red hat brigade!

I have found inspiration through the prayers my classmates have shared each day to start our classes, as well as songs at Mass (especially Gospel Mass!)...

It's hard to believe this summer's classes are coming to a close on Thursday. We will all go our separate ways, carrying our candles to our school communities. We have a great task ahead (and more coursework!), but we are not alone. Amen to that.

Unwrapping a Gift

Every day is a gift.

When we get out of bed (and throughout the entire day), we have a choice - do we unwrap it and smile, thinking 'How can I best make use of this today?',

or...

do we unwrap it and toss it to the side, thinking 'This is NOT what I wanted!'...?


I don't know about you, but I want to be the former. God has given us this beautiful world, and even in tough circumstances - because we know everyone is fighting his/her own battles and demons - He wants us to enjoy it and share His love with everyone with whom we interact.

Happy (daily) unwrapping...

Unexpected Graces

I had my plan made up in my head - I would go for a run, shower, go to daily Mass, head to the coffee shop to finish my book, and then come home. And all went according to plan...until the end of Mass. A friend from Bible study started talking to me and invited me to join the weekly prayer group that meets to talk about the upcoming Sunday's Readings. She had asked me once before, and I had said no, but I had no real excuse today so I figured, why not?

And I am so glad I went. First of all, I met some lovely older parishioners whom I had seen around the church before but whose names I didn't know. Second of all, a few people in the group were women with whom I visited the Holy Land three years ago. They are such wonderful people, so it is always a pleasure to spend extra time with them. 😀 To top it off, at the end of our time together, we celebrated one woman's 83rd birthday with cake, song, and conversation. Such joy!

Our discussion centered around the nature of hospitality and also Jesus' oft-considered harsh command that if we love our mother, father, sister, or brother more than Him that we are not worthy to follow Him. I shared a brief overview of the homily I had recently heard from Fr. Mike's podcast, where he said we need to ask ourselves two questions each day, one at the beginning when we first wake up and one at the end as we prepare to go to sleep: 1) Who do I want to live for today? & 2) Who did I live for today? Inevitably, we start our day with our eyes set on Christ, but decisions and actions (no matter how seemingly small or insignificant) lead us away from that goal. But we should keep striving each day to live for Christ. (I recommend you listen to his full homily here: 6/25/17.) I definitely need to put up post-its to remind myself about asking those questions (until it becomes a habit).

I like to make plans and to follow them. But I also like the flexibility to adjust my own schedule when opportunities arise. By saying yes, I felt that, in a small way, I was aligning myself more to God's will for my day by spending time in fellowship and Scripture reflection. Yes, I left church about 2 hours after I originally intended, but God is so good like that. And I still had plenty of time for a last-minute Target stop as well as time to finish my (for fun!) book. (I did regrettably discover that the book is part of a 4-part series, so the rest of the books have to wait till after grad school; though, I am eager to know what happens!)

Please keep me and my classmates in your prayers these upcoming weeks as we take our grad school classes. Happy summer!

The (Quiet) Beauty of Daily Mass

As I look ahead to grad school, one of the things I am actually most looking forward to (aside from seeing all of my classmates) is the opportunity for daily Mass. Heck, twice a week it's scheduled into the mid-morning for us as part of our course-load, which is pretty amazing if you ask me.

Here in Chicago there are a LOT of opportunities for daily Mass - one only needs to seek out an appropriate time and location. And so, I did. As I entered into the church (a mere 1-2 minutes early), I felt an overwhelming sense of peace and calm. It was silent and cool. It was perfect.

One of the feasts we celebrated today was that of Thomas More (love that saint!), and the Gospel was the one where Jesus taught his disciples to pray using the "Our Father." I've been trying to pray a lot more recently (though, admittedly, I am trying to pray through the intercession of Mary), so today's Mass was right up my alley. And then, after Mass, I was ready to go on my merry way (after speaking with the priest briefly). I finally tried a new coffee spot right near church, and I nearly finished that second book I am working on for grad school. (Spoiler: It actually got more interesting!)

Later it will be time for a haircut and then who knows... I still have some grad work to do before next week, but I think I'll tackle that tomorrow before a friend's birthday get-together in the evening. After all, in building up mental stamina to prepare for this summer's workload I can only handle so much a day...

Looking back...and looking ahead

Just finished up trimester 2 parent teacher conference day.

I realized a lot has happened since the last conferences for trimester 1:

- I finished my first semester of online classes for grad school.
- I enjoyed Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays with my family.
- I got a shot of cortisone in my foot and started running again, getting up to 9 miles!
- I started dating a very faith-filled, fun, and generous guy.
- I went to a couple of shows, including at the Shakespeare theater and for Wait Wait Don't Tell Me.
- I witnessed my 8th graders receive the Sacrament of Confirmation (and served as a sponsor).
- I attended the annual FL retreat with my grad school classmates.
- I led 4-8th grade Advent retreats and Reconciliation services.
- I started coaching volleyball again.
- I helped some alumni start a new chapter for the school service club.
- I roadtripped for a long weekend to St. Louis to visit with friends.
- I gave a homily during Catholic Schools Week about why I stay in Catholic education.
- I played in the student-faculty basketball game.
- I saw more movies in the theater than I had seen in the past year combined.
- Lent started, and I am working hard to maintain my Lenten promises and use them to help me grow closer to God and others.


And there was probably plenty more that happened along the way (as I know I have had many failures and mistakes too)...

As I look ahead to trimester 3 and the ending of my second semester of online classes for grad school, I have a full, happy heart. I am so grateful for the people who have been walking this journey with me. As I close the chapter of year 30 of my life and prepare to turn 31 this upcoming week (ah!), I can't help but smile.

God is good and always here - in the best of times and in the lowest of times. May these 40 days of Lent be a time of preparation, reflection, healing, and hope for all of us. Amen.