Learning to die, learning to live

Birthdays are much more exciting when you're younger, aren't they? 8 going on 9, 12 going on 13, 20 going on 21... those are some milestones! And what kid doesn't love (ice cream) cake and presents?

32 going on 33? Not so much.

At some point, though I'm not sure when, it just starts feeling like another day, another year ticking by. It really makes me think of "When Harry Met Sally":

It's birthdays, holidays, and family celebrations (i.e. weddings, funerals, reunions) that make me wonder what I'm doing with my life. And I don't mean that in any kind of "whoa is me" sentimentality; I mean it in the "have I been doing enough with my life?" way...

I've been using the "Memento Mori" daily Lenten journal, which requires the user to pause and think, even if just so slightly, about mortality and life's purpose. In light of this, I can't help also thinking about Tuesdays with Morrie, which is one of my go-tos in terms of reflecting on death:

Now, I don't mean to be morbid, but it's helpful (at least for myself) to think along the lines of this: If I die today...

• will I have done the best I could and strived for sainthood?
• will I have told family and friends that I love them?
• will I have left a grudge or broken relationship unmended?
• will I have helped lessen the burdens of others, brought others to Christ, and/or lived the works of mercy?
• will I have left this world a little bit better than I found it?

Death is a hard pill to swallow; it's never easy to say goodbye to a loved one. Reminders pop up from time to time to bring our attention back to a certain person, or we want to run and tell our loved one about something that happened but we can't, or any number of things. And when it's our turn to have others say goodbye to us, the unknown can be frightening. But we have the promise of redemption, of heaven, of something better than we have ever known.

So, as we continue this Lenten season, let us pray that we live our lives each day to the fullest as a way to prepare our hearts and minds for daily deaths to self and our one day death in this life to be born into the next. Amen.

Play On

All humans are musical; why else would the Lord have given you a beating heart? 

- The Magic Strings of Frankie Presto

Growing up, I can hardly recall a day in our house that I didn't hear the tinkling of piano keys or the strumming of guitar strings. Music in all of its glorious forms is something that has been a part of me, deep within me, for as long as I can remember. My parents put me and my sister through lessons, piano first (starting in kindergarten and going through college) followed by flute lessons (starting in third grade and going through high school) as well as different choir and voice opportunities. It was such a gift, and now, as an adult, I realize how special those opportunities were.

But recently, I realized I was missing being able to play the piano. Only after I purchased a keyboard (88 weighted keys + a sustain pedal!) did I realize just how good it would be to practice again. I have found that my fingers can find their way (mostly) to the right keys when I take out my music. Yet, scales hurt my left hand (because it's so weak), and I have a lot of work to do to be able to play some of the songs I once did. Still, I have also found such peace seated on my small bench (which also came with the keyboard). Between playing the keyboard and going to the gym/running, I know I can reduce the stress of the upcoming final semester of grad school.

Beautiful, isn't it?

And so, I play on...

Why failing to fail is the worst failure of all

One of my favorite songs as a kid had a line in the middle that said, "You gotta win a little, lose a little..." I have to lose, huh? Yes, it is part of the process.

If you don't want to take it from me or from this song, just look at a handful of many bits of wisdom about failure a quick Google search provided:

"Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new." - Albert Einstein

"Failure is not the opposite of success; it is part of success." - Anonymous

"Winners are not afraid of losing. But losers are. Failure is part of the process of success. People who avoid failure avoid success." - Robert Kiyosaki

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal; it is the courage to continue that counts." - Winston Churchill


The reason I was thinking about this idea of failure recently is not because of grad school. Please, we haven't even started the semester yet! Instead, it is because I binge-watched the first season of "The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel" on Amazon this weekend. (I'm not saying I'm proud of that - it was way too much television in too short a period of time.) While some of the language and topics are crude/distasteful, I think the show has value overall. One of the big ideas I think audiences can take away is that everybody bombs. Tanking is part of the process. And you have to be okay with that - not just okay, though; you have to be willing to learn from it.

If you've seen the show, you know that Midge carries around that notebook of hers that she uses to take copious notes once she decides comedy is her thing. That's an example of how Midge is willing (after a few periods of serious self-doubt about her talent) to learn from the success of others and a combination of her own successes and failures. Her manager and a few others help her figure this out. (Don't worry, I wouldn't consider this information a spoiler.)

Growing up, I was way too serious about everything and often nervous to try something new if I thought I wouldn't measure up to the expectations. This went for school, sports, extracurriculars, classes I decided to take in college - you name it. I probably missed out on a lot. I'm surprised I didn't give myself ulcers. And it was my own fault - I brought that fear of failure on myself; it wasn't exercised on me by anyone else. I just couldn't get comfortable with failing.

But let me tell you something, teaching has made me less afraid of failure because it's impossible not to fall flat on your face from time to time (or, daily) in front of your students. Without the failure, I wouldn't know how to get better as a teacher. Nothing is more honest and raw than the feedback of a teenager - they let you know if something wasn't good or right. Working with kids is humbling and, sometimes, slightly humiliating on a regular basis.

I'm never going to be one of those picture-perfect Pinterest teachers who make everything and every lesson seem like magic and unicorns. It's messy business. It's hard work. And when I got into it, I had no idea how much I was going to fail - no one prepares you for that; nothing can prepare you for the students in your care. But you know something else? Kids are resilient. They'll learn something, even if the day felt like a flop. And they'll still love you, even when you wanted to (metaphorically) wring their necks the day before. Failure is a natural part of the learning cycle - you just gotta keep it going with persistence, creativity, hard work, and a little (or a lot of) luck.

So fail big, my friends. Or, in the words of Randy Pausch (The Last Lecture), "Better to fail spectacularly than to do something mediocre." And, make sure you take time to learn from it. (Don't worry, I'm taking my own advice too.)

Can you tell school is on the brain? We're back at it... How many weeks until Easter break?

Love your WHY

In between the football touchdowns that Notre Dame has been trading with Duke, I've been catching up on reading assignments for grad school. After tough days of teaching where kiddos are bouncing off the walls or on days when things actually are executed as planned (and on every day in between), it's easy to get demoralized.

Therefore, it's nice to take the opportunity from time to time to remember what our role as educators in a Catholic school is really all about. One of the articles I read really struck me in this way. Here's one short quote (from the very short article):

"Take your passion, gifts and talents to inspire and to evangelize the next generation. Catholic school educators have a calling toward grace through their work with children. Live like the saints, emulate the lives of those that have gone before and be ready for not only your future, but like Archbishop Oscar Romero prayed, the future not our own. The future is our schools, our children, and our faith. Pray for it. Live it. Enjoy what you do every day. Trust in your knowledge and that you do know how to teach. Above all else, love why you do it. The grace of God's work is truly amazing." 

(I added emphasis with the parts in bold.)

I don't believe I am allowed to post the article, but here's the information in case you want to look it up: "Love Your Why" / Beckley, Gary / Publication Title: Momentum / Volume 44 / Issue 1

We are in the "business" of Catholic education. We are building Saints.

Quotable Inspiration

Sometimes you just need a good old-fashioned inspirational quote. Or a handful.

I was scrolling through Pinterest this morning, killing time before braving the brutally cold elements to go to the gym, when I came across some of these gems - enjoy:

"Fall"ing

I keep joking with coworkers, family, and friends that maybe after the 6th grade girls' volleyball season is over I just might have a life. Seriously, though, there have been so many things that have been piling up that I want to blog about, but I just haven't had the time to sit down and do it.

And, just to be clear, I'm not saying that I'm not enjoying and learning from every bit of what life is throwing at me right now - don't worry, I haven't gotten to this point:

If I ever do get here, you'll know - I'll be miserable. :P

Enough about all of that; let's turn our attention to Fall!

Don't you just love the Daily Quipple?

Fall is my favorite season - it always has been, even though growing up in Florida we never had the changing leaves or cooler weather (at least not until January, really). It's football season, and school is still fresh & new. There are apples to be picked (doing that with some friends today!) and coats to be taken out of the closet (need to do that sometime soon). There are pumpkins to be carved and pumpkin treats to bake/taste.

And change is in the air - both changes we're excited about and changes we may have mixed feelings or be sad about. One of my good friends from church just got a new job (awesome!)...in St. Louis (not so awesome). As a few of us (including the gal who just got the new job) were sitting around at dinner last night (see image below for what our sushi looked like), we were talking about how on one hand we are going to miss her a lot but, on the other hand, how it's impossible not to be thrilled for this new opportunity where she will have more job satisfaction than she does now and be back with her immediate family. One of the other girls said something along the lines of "It's not about me. If it were, it'd be easy to say, 'You can't leave. I need you here.' But since it's not, I want what's best for you."

Mixed emotions, there we have it.

But all in all, there is so much to look forward to and be excited about on personal and professional levels. Here are just a few things:

Personal --> upcoming young adult retreat next weekend, apple picking with friends (today!), Chicago marathon cheering, friends' birthday celebrations, CST show...
Professional --> ongoing leadership opportunities with my school's data/school improvement committee, a unit on Catholic Social Teaching with 8th grade, a field trip to the theater with 6th grade, continued collaboration with the middle school team...

So, there you have it: Fall in a nutshell. I hope you find change and contentment in the beauty of this Fall...

One and Done...Well, I Guess We're Just Beginning

Day 1 is in the books, folks.

And it was a good day...even though I did get a touch frustrated with the 8th graders due to chattiness and not following directions. (But, as a coworker pointed out, they're not malicious or doing things to hurt people on purpose. He's right - if chattiness is our biggest problem, we should consider ourselves, or, really our students, lucky.) But, if it takes 5 times instead of 4, or if something isn't going as planned, we'll break it down further and go over it again. Procedures, procedures, procedures + high expectations, that's what I'm striving to bring to my classroom this year.

I'm also striving to be more organized and prepared. Let's face it, it's not usually the kids' fault - there was likely faulty directions, unclear expectations, hasty release of responsibility, or the mere forgetfulness of the fact that I am, in fact, dealing with teenagers (and their respective hormones). So, yeah, it's going to take some extra effort and foresight (and some flexibility) in the beginning, but we'll get there. I have faith in that (and in them).

In other (teaching-related) news...Today we will celebrate Mass as a school community, both campuses uniting in prayer and fellowship. It is a great testament to our values as a Catholic school. (Now, if only I can get the middle schoolers to sing...hmm...)

I'm looking forward to the start of volleyball practice (today!) and settling into the teaching routine. Plus, I already have a happy hour in the works with a few teaching and non-teaching friends this Friday. Let's keep this week going!

Everyone Should Read This

This is a story for students who have ever felt stupid or left out.

This is a story for teachers who have tried to make a difference or who need to be reminded of the fact that each student is talented and has potential...it just may show up differently.

This is a story for parents to be open to getting their children the help they may need...it's not going to stigmatize them for life.

This is a story for everyone.

Albert Einstein was a genius. He apparently also had dyslexia...and so does the main character (Ally) in Fish in a Tree. (It just doesn't get a name/diagnosis till over halfway through the novel.) This story makes you laugh, especially with Albert's (a regular child genius, if I do say so) quips/thoughts and Keisha's comebacks. (Albert and Keisha become Ally's best friends.) It also breaks your heart to see the bullying of kids who don't treat those who are different with any lick of respect or kindness.

Over the course of the novel, Ally grows in her understanding of the difficulties she faces in school. She also learns to appreciate those things at which she is talented, such as art. Her teacher, Mr. Daniels, guides her in striving to reach her potential and persevere in learning how to read.

Did I mention this is one of our incoming 6th graders' summer reading books? Pretty pumped about that...

Things Miss Foyle Says...

Years from now, my students may not remember much of what they learned in class (or, maybe they will - I can only hope), but, if they think of me at all, they'll probably remember these oft repeated phrases that have become staples in our classroom:

Unless you're about to throw up, bleeding, or on fire, you may not come speak with me when I'm with a reading group.

The only thing you need to bring to the carpet is your lovely self.

That book is my favorite. Well, that one is too...

Mints are good brain food (for tests).

(while praying Stations of the Cross) Jesus suffered on the cross for three hours; you can stand for 20 minutes.

Doing nothing is not an option.

Nowhere on the board does it say talk to your neighbor.


Anyways, you get the idea. What you say says a lot about you, doesn't it?

Little...But Done With Love

On Wednesday, we celebrated the feast day of St. Therese of Lisieux, a Saint who is known for doing little things with great love for God:

There is a lot we can take away from St. Therese, the little flower. She is a Saint we can relate to, especially those who are young, for she died when she was only 24.

Through the intercession of St. Therese, may we grow in holiness by practicing little acts of great love for others and for God. Amen.

More student response favs

You can't make this stuff up. The mix between student profundity and responses that make you chuckle is incredible. Below are some of my favorite responses gathered from 7th grade student surveys about their understanding of the Mass:

In response to "What does the word 'Amen' mean?" -->

• "You have finished praying"
• "I think it means 'ok' - a combination of thank you and ok"

In response to "Why do we genuflect when we enter the pew at Church?"

• "To show respect to God and to say hello"
• "To enter ourselves and start the mass, I am taking a guess, by the way, sorry I forgot."
• "We genuflect to show we are starting prayer and mass and we genuflectat the end to show mass is over."

I love my job.

(Finally) Packing the Suitcase Away

There are many things I haven't kept up with this summer...and blogging is apparently one of them. As school starts, who knows if I'll be able to keep up - I hope I will. I'll have a brand new desk to keep my computer on in our living/dining room here at the apartment (photos to come once I pick it up from the store and assemble it), so there will really be no excuses - I'll finally have real work space! :)

Enough about all that, though...

I must say, I believe I lived the following quote this summer:

- because that's just about what happened. (I haven't used my own closet since the middle of June!)

But it was totally worth it.

However, things are finally settling down - back in Chicago to get ready to start the school year. (No more "big" trips till October - phew!) The suitcase is stored under my bed, and clothes are hanging in the closet as I try to get all the wrinkles out.

I'm glad to be home, yes, but I wouldn't trade this past summer for the world. As the final days of summer wind down, it's time to wind up for school mode. Let's go!

Saturday Goodness

"It's supposed to hurt - that's how you know it meant something."

In the touring production of Peter and the Starcatcher, this line was spoken by Molly in one of the final scenes. While most of the play is full of great puns (e.g. immediately after Black Stache loses his right hand, Smee answers, "Here I am, I'm your right-hand man, captain" to which the audience responds with a loud groan), slapstick, and one-liners that remind the theatre-goers of Monty Python and the like, the play leaves you feeling that you've just grown up a little - that you've realized some of life's big lessons (like the one stated above).

The tour's just about over - so there's not much you can do now if you haven't seen it (Sorry about that!) - but it was definitely a show worth experiencing. Though mostly a straight play, it does have a few key musical numbers that keep the play moving along. The cast members were terrific, filling the space with few props and big personalities. Truly, it was a delight.

And, to top it all of, we had a miraculously beautiful day in Chicago yesterday - I mean, it was absolutely gorgeous to be out and about strolling downtown...with thousands of other residents and visitors who had the same idea. I'm glad my sister and I made the most of the weather yesterday because today is a complete 180 - rain and plunging temperatures. (Guess we won't see 70 again for awhile...) So, today I've spent most of my time inside - the gym, the blood bank (though my iron level was still too low by just a hair), a brunch place with my sister and her co-workers, and home (working on school stuff) - and tonight will be spent at Palm Sunday Mass (which is one of my absolute favorites of the liturgical year!), which is also inside.

Only 4 days to go this week...but I've got some busy days with the kiddos ahead. Here's hoping we get to Easter quickly...can't wait to see my family!

Still Winter...

I'm out of ideas for tonight, so here is some Daily Quipple love:

“People don’t notice whether it’s winter or summer when they’re happy.” [Anton Chekhov]

I hope you have a wonderful week! Look on the bright side - it's bound to be warming up soon...

A (Happy) Thought

One of my new favorite daily morning emails is from the Daily Quipple. There's usually a quote, suggestion, inspirational image, etc. to help get your day off on the right foot.

For example, here is Sunday's - it came right to my inbox (how lovely!):

See? Easy reminders & suggestions - simple tips to move toward happiness. (And our world could definitely use a little more happy.)

I just wish I could see the stars more in the city...

On a heavier note, this article by Fr. Robert Barron is a worthwhile read about upholding the moral teachings of the Church. It's a bit lengthy, but it is also important to keep in mind in our world today.

Look Within

“Happiness is not in our circumstances, but in ourselves. It is not something we see, like a rainbow, or feel, like the heat of the fire. Happiness is something we are.” - John B. Sheerin

I love this quote.

Above all else, this quote reminds us that happiness cannot come from outside sources. Happiness is found within...and we can choose to foster it. Sure, there are things that seem to make us happier than others - people, activities, etc. But really, in any circumstance, we can choose happiness. We can reach deeply within ourselves and find it.

It reminds me of learning about the Sacraments with my 6th graders. (Bear with me here.) We discussed how Sacraments are visible signs of God's love and grace in our lives: We cannot see God's love or His unmerited grace (just like, in the quote, we can't see happiness), but we catch glimpses and find "evidence" in the Sacraments, nature, etc. God's love is a huge part of who we are, and the Sacraments make us holier and closer to God. God is around us, yes, but, more importantly, God is within us.

And I think we would all do well to remember that...

Was That Choice Moral or Not? - A Classroom Activity & Assessment

Dear George, 
Remember, no man is a failure who has friends.
Thanks for the wings!
Love, Clarence

Thus (nearly) ends the beloved holiday classic, "It's a Wonderful Life" - a film that tells the story of George Bailey and the many people whose lives he touches by his innate desire to put family and friends above personal wants and human dignity above profit.

In my humble opinion (as I'm sure I've mentioned before), this is the greatest holiday classic movie of all time, so I thought it would be worthwhile to show this movie to my 6th grade students (especially since most of them had never seen it before). However, seeing as I only see each period for 40-45 minutes a day, I couldn't reconcile giving up valuable teaching time to watch a movie just for the sake of watching a movie. (On a side note - when I taught 4th grade, I didn't have any problem simply putting in a movie, as in a self-contained classroom, I saw them all day and the poor dears were restless by the end of most days leading up to Christmas break.) So, I had to find (or create) a bridge between the movie and our latest unit, which focused (at least in part) on moral decision-making.

Well, George and the other characters surely make a lot of decisions throughout the course of the movie - from saving Harry's life to not delivering the pills from Mr. Gower to sending Harry to school instead of himself so as to run the family business...the list of decisions (good and bad) goes on and on.

Bingo.

This is about how I felt when I figured out the connection

I would have the students apply the three components of moral decision-making that we learned about to the scenarios/decisions in the movie. So, the weekend before that last week before break, I crafted the assessment & rubric.

Looking back on the assessment (as I am currently scoring their letters/essays), there are things I would change about it for the future. For example, I would provide some scenarios from the movie for them and have them proceed to apply the moral decision-making components in order to avoid a mere summary of movie events. I would also be more explicit with the directions about including connections to our own prayer lives, as that was the source of some confusion with the movie.

But overall, I think the kiddos did a nice job. Here's an excerpt from one student's essay:

"...When George Bailey jumped into the river to save Clarence, his object was jumping into the river...his intention was to save Clarence, and the circumstances were George Bailey was on the bridge at night with freezing water. Since saving Clarence was good in all three elements, the moral decision was good..."

Well, I think most of them got the gist of the assignment. 

...And they enjoyed this holiday classic - some even told me as they left class on Thursday afternoon that this was their new favorite Christmas film. (And I do believe they were telling the truth.)

George Bailey and his friends/family sure do have a lot to teach all of us about making decisions that reflect good morals on friendship, family, and human worth. By the end of the film, we learn that George really was the richest man in town, not by the standards of Mr. Potter but by the richness of his life blessed with those whose lives he touched.

This movie never gets old. In fact, I watched it three times this year (two of those times were with my two six grade classes and one was with my family), and I never got bored. Additionally, much like the sentiment stated below, I cried every time.

I do hope you (and your loved ones) had the chance (or will soon take the chance) to watch this movie over the holiday season. May this Christmas and New Years be a blessed one for you!

Quotable

Another Value Quote of the Day to pass along:

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

Melody Beattie - author, journalist

Whenever You Remember

It's hard not to think with fondness of the past, isn't it? I find myself every now and again thinking back to times in college, my ACE experience, and even just last year teaching 4th grade. And I find myself wishing I could be there, in those moments, again. Sometimes, I accidentally take a turn down the wrong hallway at school, and I find myself outside the 4th grade doors. (Oops.) It's such a routine...it's such a part of the road that led me to where I am today.

It's not that I have rose-colored glasses. At least, I don't think I do. And it's not that I don't enjoy where I am right now. I do. (In fact, I am SO blessed to be where I am right now - I love the opportunities, people, and school.) 

So, I don't know what it is. But I do know many people find themselves in the very same boat. I don't believe this to be a bad thing, by any means, unless we find ourselves in a position like the quotation states below:

It's okay to miss the past. Some things and people and memories can never be replaced. And it's important to learn from those times and avoid any similar mistakes and such in the present or future. 

But, as I think this quotation makes very clear, it is not okay to let the past cast a shadow on our happiness today. When we are caught up in the present moments, especially those that are stressful or difficult, it's hard to keep the perspective of contentment with the here and now. If we keep wishing for yesterdays, we miss out on all that today has to offer. It may not be the same as it was, but different may be just as good...or even better.

So, let's strive to remember yesterday but live for today.

Happy Saturday!

The Greatest Love Story

“The greatest love story of all time is contained in a little white host.” 

-Bishop Fulton Sheet

What a simple and beautiful thought - Jesus truly is the embodiment of God's perfect love for each of us, and Catholics are reminded of this every time we approach the altar to receive the Eucharist.

How do I help my middle schoolers realize this love? How do I move some of them (especially 7th grade) past the whole faith as a feeling and into a faith rooted in reason and understanding?

Hmm...