32 going on 33? Not so much.
At some point, though I'm not sure when, it just starts feeling like another day, another year ticking by. It really makes me think of "When Harry Met Sally":
It's birthdays, holidays, and family celebrations (i.e. weddings, funerals, reunions) that make me wonder what I'm doing with my life. And I don't mean that in any kind of "whoa is me" sentimentality; I mean it in the "have I been doing enough with my life?" way...
I've been using the "Memento Mori" daily Lenten journal, which requires the user to pause and think, even if just so slightly, about mortality and life's purpose. In light of this, I can't help also thinking about Tuesdays with Morrie, which is one of my go-tos in terms of reflecting on death:
Now, I don't mean to be morbid, but it's helpful (at least for myself) to think along the lines of this: If I die today...
- will I have done the best I could and strived for sainthood?
- will I have told family and friends that I love them?
- will I have left a grudge or broken relationship unmended?
- will I have helped lessen the burdens of others, brought others to Christ, and/or lived the works of mercy?
- will I have left this world a little bit better than I found it?
Death is a hard pill to swallow; it's never easy to say goodbye to a loved one. Reminders pop up from time to time to bring our attention back to a certain person, or we want to run and tell our loved one about something that happened but we can't, or any number of things. And when it's our turn to have others say goodbye to us, the unknown can be frightening. But we have the promise of redemption, of heaven, of something better than we have ever known.
So, as we continue this Lenten season, let us pray that we live our lives each day to the fullest as a way to prepare our hearts and minds for daily deaths to self and our one day death in this life to be born into the next. Amen.
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